Want To Combat Climate Change–Then Mask Those Cows!

by Al Benson Jr.

If you thought you’d heard it all on the subject of climate change, well, you ain’t heard nothing yet. Climate change–they used to call it “global warming” until enough evidence emerged to prove all it was was another leftist ploy for more control over our lives. Once that happened, global warming fell into disrepute and so those leftists among us that want to tell us how we should live and want the power to do so had to come up with another name so they could continue their political charade. Climate Change was the name they came up with and they started the same game all over with a brand new name.

A recent article in The New American magazine showed the riduculous lengths these people will go to in order to force their ideology down our throats. The article noted that: “Just when you thought climate change fanatics had reached peak insanity, word comes that none other than the heir to the British throne is backing a plan that would have cows wear special face masks to control methane emitted by rumination.”

So now they want to make cows wear face masks to cut down on the methane gas they produce when chewing their cud. I’m sure that will fight climate change just great. One has to wonder if these masks will only be used on British cows or will all cows worldwide, except for those in Communist countries, be forced to mask up.

A British company has actually designed the bovine mask and the New American article also observed: “The proposed bovine mask …contains solar powered fans intended to reduce methane emissions from cows chewing their cud into a chamber which chemically converts the methane into carbon dioxide and water vapor.” Those cows will really appreciate those solar powered fans in their masks–it will make their whole day!

I don’t know about you, but I was totally unaware that cows produced such dangerous amounts of methane gas by simply chewing their cud. Shows you what new facts you can learn when you tune in to the climate change scenario.

I wonder how this cow masking deal will work out in our American Southwest, or in Wyoming or Montana? Will all the ranchers have to hire some specially trained person to go around their ranches to make sure all their cattle are properly masked? What a boon this will be to the cattle industry! And I’m sure the feds will want to regulate this process with a whole new set of rules and regulations as to the proper masking of all cattle. More good news for cattlemen! There are even now so many federal regulations to try to follow that a Philadelphia lawyer couldn’t remember them all–even on election day. After all, it takes lots of rules to “fight climate change” and to try to regulate our lives, but fear not, the feds are more than up to that chore.The rules they make may not make any sense, but they will be on the books.

If the Brits want to mask their cattle, that’s up to them, but leave American cattle (and ranchers) alone. They have enough to deal with already, and they need this foolishness about as much as they need another hole in their heads! Maybe they can change the words of that old cowboy song to “Ride around them dogies, ride around them slow–their brand new face masks are a rarin’ to go.”


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